Dear Brown Girl,
It’s a new year and it’s still the same me. This year, I am not even going to attempt to lie to myself by claiming that I will have new year resolutions because who am I trying to fool? It would end up just like every year where I just simply give up and return to what I was previously doing.
So that is why instead I have decided that it’s not going to be ‘New Year, New Me’. Instead, it’s going to be ‘New Year, Better Me’ because why do I need to change everything about myself and become ‘new’. Admittedly there are things that I need to work on and that’s okay. I never said that I am perfect and to be honest, I don’t think I would ever get to that point where I would think that there is nothing in my life to improve.
I know for myself that when I start thinking that it’s just New Year Resolutions, it starts losing any meaning once February rolls around. I get motivated for a month and then lose interest just as quickly. Being motivated is hard enough but having to think about keeping those goals for the whole year? Yeah nah. No, thank you. I would much rather not. It’s when I start thinking of it as a burden rather than something to get excited about that it truly starts dragging my mood down.
So what should we do to combat this? This year, I am going to start thinking of them as improvements rather than a resolution because let’s be honest, how many resolutions have I truly set for myself has been done? Exactly! Not that many. Lose weight? Yeah right. Save money? I wish. Be more selfless? Getting there. So, I am going to change how I word things this time around and actually not put so much pressure on myself. These goals are meant to help me improve, not create more anxiety and burdens.
So here we go! These are my 5 Aspirations for this coming year:
One: Rather than saying that I want to lose weight, I will say
“I will take care of my health and eat healthier”
Let’s be honest, I say that I would lose weight each and every year and I never pull through. Rather than just focusing on a certain number, I will instead make better choices about what kind of food I consume and have healthier alternatives to all the McDonalds and KFC that I eat. I always set this goal but when I get tempted and give in once, I just throw it out the window as I already think that I have failed. Let’s make better choices this year, Brown Girl!
Two:“Learn two new languages”
Now, I know that will not be able to be fluent in two languages within a year because do I look like Einstein to you? What I do want to do is to be able to at least hold a decent conversation with someone in these two languages. If I can go beyond that level, that would be amazing! I am fluent in Tongan and in English but wouldn’t it be great to be able to connect with more people around the world?
So after thinking about it for a while, I chose French and Korean.
I chose French because I currently work part time at a french cafe here in Wellington called La Cloche. There are so many French people who work with me that can easily teach me. I would be surrounded with people who are fluent! Why not immerse myself in the language? It would be an easy way to learn phrases, pick up pointers on grammar and if I would ever have questions, there would always be someone to answer them. I basically have free tutors who can help me.
Now, you might be thinking; “Why Korean?”. Well let me tell you a story that is set back in 2009 when a young girl was in a computer lab sitting next to a friend who was watching a music video then… BAM! Young girl because addicted to Kpop and then Kdrama… then came the food and then because obsessed with the culture. Can you guess who this young was?! Yup, it was me. While Kpop may have been the reason as to why I took interest in Korea in the first place, I would have to say that their culture was what really locked me in. Their history and their story as a country is both intriguing as well as saddening. Their way of life and the importance of respect really does resonate with me as these are also important within my own culture. So it wasn’t really a big shock to myself that I instantly grated towards learning the language. It will be a challenge but it is one that I have happily taken on. I’m just hoping for the best!
Three: “Spend less on things that I do not need”
Saving is hard. Especially for someone like me who loves to eat and eat and well… eat. My goal is simple. Stop buying things that I do not need and start saving. I have three big trips coming up this year and I already know it is going to be a struggle. My first trip is to Cambodia with ADRA (Adventist Disaster Relief Agency) as a volunteer. I want to be able to help others just like so many have helped me in the past. It would be an amazing trip and I am ready for the lessons that I am to learn. The next trip would be to the USA. As you know, Brown Girl, family is important and one of my first cousins is finally tying the knot with his beautiful fiancé so I can not miss their special day. Celebrating with them is a high priority. The last trip would be back home to the beautiful Kingdom of Tonga. My father’s family is having a reunion and it’s the first that they’ve ever held. One of my grandmothers is unwell and would love for the children to get together. How can I not comply to her simple wish? After she has shown not only my father but also myself so much love, am I truly not able to give her this one thing? Like I said, family is important! This year is going to be amazing. Expensive, but amazing.
Four: “Spend more time with family and friends”
This year, one of the things that I really want to do is to show my family and friends how much I love them. I think that I spend so much time not really paying attention to them and while I do highly value them, I don’t spend enough time showing them how truly important they are to me. I don’t ever want to regret that I was too late to show someone that I loved them. That is not a feeling that I ever want to feel again. I will take the time to contact family. I will not only tell them that I care but actually show them. This year will be the year of actions and not just words. Let’s not just talk about it but actually get to it.
Five:“Learn something new everyday”
Let’s not get lazy, Brown Girl! Let’s learn something everyday. It could be a random fact, a current event on the news or simply something about a friend that you never knew. Let’s surprise ourselves each day with the amazing things that this world has. Brown Girl, this world is full of wonders! Start learning, start looking, start understanding the world you live in!
All in all, let’s be thankful that we made it to this year, Brown Girl! We did it! We are here in 2019! Let the lessons of 2018 push you forward but let’s avoid making the same mistakes. Be grateful for all that you have.
I’m proud of you Brown Girl!
Bring on 2019!