Dear Future Me

Dear Future Me,

First of all, I know that within the last couple of years you would have gone through many up and downs and I just wanted to say that YOU MADE IT! You pushed through and you got yourself to a place where you can look back and reminisce about things. You did not give up and you are still walking this path of life. So for this alone I congratulate you!

There are many things that I wish we could have achieved. Many things that we should have done or tried to do but could not. I also know that whatever day dreams that was in our head was not all achievable and some things could not be done so do not be so hard on yourself! We both know that sometimes we get too ahead of ourselves.

There are so many questions that I have for you that it is driving me crazy which only you can answer! How are we? What have we become? What have we achieved?

I wish you could tell me because the future seems so unclear! I do not even know what we will become! Are we a lawyer? A teacher? An astronaut? Or have we become a Llama breeder and a Lion Tamer like our year 9 online social studies quiz told us we will become? I worry a lot about what we will turn out like. Are we a home owner or are we living in Tonga in our childhood home? It is driving me nuts that I am I not like some of my friends who are so sure of themselves and their future. I write to you with a million questions which weighs heavy on my heart.

I want you to know that I am proud of you regardless of what you have become. I know I worry about it a lot but just know that I will be content with whatever path we have chosen to go on. I know that you have made the right choices and that it is for the better of our future! Just please do not embarrass us too much along the way! I know that sometimes you talk way too much and you annoy a lot of people but please refrain from doing so! Please do not say unnecessary things and please think before you speak!

What I am also very curious about is who has managed to stick by your side this whole time. Who has managed to put up with your craziness that they have not left yet? Just know that whatever friends you have lost along the way is okay. Life takes people out of your life for different reasons and sometimes you just outgrow each other. Do not be too hard on yourself that you have lost people along the way.

How’s Mum and Dad? Are they okay? I think I worry about them the most. You know Dad has a heart problem and everyday I wonder if this is the day I will get a call that he has had another heart attack. I want you to know how lucky you are to have them and that no matter what they do you should always be thankful that they are still around and that they have your back.

If they are not around then I am truly sorry for you. I am sorry that you will never hear their nagging ever again. I am sorry that you will not hear they voices or hug them. I am sorry that you will never feel their unconditional love and I am truly sorry that you will never have that safe haven to go to ever again. I want you to know that I am trying my best to do right by them, which is hard and we both know that. I want you to know that I am trying to cherish the time we have left with them and that I am doing all that I can to make our time special.

Here is the hard part. The part where I tell you that I will mess up. I will stumble and as your past self I hope that you can understand that I am not perfect and that I will embarrass us in someway or form. Please do not be too disappointed on who we have become and I hope that you do not shun me away but use me as a learning point. Please cherish our pant no matter how ugly it may be. I apologise if I ever do anything to hinder our future.

Best Of luck,

Lena 

xoxo

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